THE DESSERT RULES

• Desert must be brown
• If you locked me in a room full of chocolate cake, only one of us would come out alive
• No fruit and chocolate
• No cheese & cake
• Jell-O must have no obstructions
• Jell-O cannot be shaped
• Flourless chocolate cake.. Why?
• Beige is a color for trench coats, not cake
• Butterscotch is gay
• Birthday cake, only for birthdays
• No passing single dessert around table at birthdays for everyone to share.  Get your own. 
• No "vanilla bean" stuff hiding under Chocolate Cake for "presentation" please
• A cupcake is neither a cup, nor a cake so why bother?
• Cupcakes are wrong because they violate the critical frosting to cake ratio and thus, are hard to eat (unless you have really big mouth).